Thursday, March 26, 2009

Daytime Tv and Unemployment Blues


Hello all, so I've been unemployed for sometime now and besides applying for jobs online, by mail, and in person, I have been trying to stay sane. When you have a shit-ton of free time, you mind tends to go a little crazy. I end up for the most part in the mourning watching TV in my underpants, eating cereal. Finally times are a changing, and I've been accepted into the U of MN teaching program to be a biology teacher. I'm super happy, but I feel like this whole time I should have pursued another career that I feel totally confident I can do well. Maybe its all the daytime TV but I think I could be an amazing jingle writer.

Jingles you say? Why would you want to do that? Those stupid songs get stuck in my head all the time?! Well, I answer I want to be that jackass who writes a catchy tune and makes you slowly go crazy. Think about it, Jingles are sweet as hell! You get paid for writing a 20 second tune! shit I can do that in my underwear and while eating cereal. Plus, some people find these jingles to be heart warming, bringing out happy thoughts of there childhood. Anyone remember coco-wheats and how they can't be beat? I remember that tune, despite never eating them, and you know what, I'm happy cause it showed during cartoons. Also, a while back Goldfish changed their jingle from "I love fishes cause there so Delicious" to some other thing about them be baked and not fried. I don't even care cause the second jingle sucked so much. I think many would agree and strongly urge you all to write to Goldfish to set things right.

I am going to flat out say it, I think the freecrdit report guys are cool! Those songs are funny! In the jingle community they totally top 1-800-588-2300 empire...today and "Gimme that Fillet-o-Fish" which FSN has to show 60 times a hockey game. Its just so weird.? Well, because of my love for these credit commercials I did some investigating with the help of Ronnie Waldjawkowski. I found that the lead guy is Eric Violette, and he is French Canadian. http://www.ericviolette.com/index_eng.php and apparently he is only an actor who is dubbed by another person for the commercials! I know, Sad! It was probably for the best, just watch Jacues Lamier of the Mn wild to get an understanding of how his English is and you have "french canadian". It would be pretty boring if he sang like that too. Well, going over his resume, this guy apparently has martial arts training so I'm hoping to see if they utilize that in the next commercial. Holy shit, this dude put his number online I could call him right now?...

Anywho, If someone just gave me a chance I think I could sell some stuff with some sweet grooves. Maybe the Sham-wow! can't sell it self, maybe a jingle may be helpful:

So I threw a big party,
and my friends all barf,
Spilled beer and booze, and now my carpets all fucked,
But its OK, Its all right,
Cause I'll just Sham-wow that shit out tonight!


FreeCreditReport if other screw your credit. Just as a personal note, my roommate does pay rent regularly. Thanks Steve couldn't do it with out you!


So my roommate, yeah my buddy,
didn't pay the rent, and now my credit is bad
So I can't open up my dojo and make some money
and now I'm fighting crime as a part time job instead


No I can't get a loan, for a fuckin' dojo
cause my roommate thought it was better to buy beer instead
so now I'm in tights and a mask handing out business cards
to guys i just beat the head.


So there you have it, untapped talent just sitting in underwear waiting for paychecks to start rollin' in.


Nick

Thursday, March 5, 2009

Nick's Modern Life


Hello All! So the past two weeks or so I've been addicted to a cartoon from my childhood, Rocco's Modern Life. If you remember this cartoon, you may remember a lovable wallabee and his his friends Heffer and Filburt. However, as I began watching this cartoon, I realized that this show is laced with sexual induendos, double meanings, and social commentary on the 90s. What an amazing show!

As I was watching I discovered that many of the jokes and humor of the show stuck with me for years after its cancellation. Cartoons can have a huge impact on what we find humorous. I used to repeat jokes from Rocco and my roommate can remember nearly every Simpsons joke. The Witty comedy has shaped our humor, making us more intelligent. I realized something though as I was watching, there are no cartoons like Rocco anymore. What has happened to Nickelodeon and Cartoon Network. As kids our generation was treated to shows like Rocco, Ren & Stimpy, and Looney Toons, and we didn't even realize their importance in comedy. Modern Life is able to take classic slapstick comedy and pair it with intelligent humor. The creator, Joe Murray, currently has a show on cartoon network called Camp Lazlo. The show has some of the same feel as Rocco's Modern Life in the sense of lovable characters, classic cartoon slapstick, and gross humor. However it seems as if this is directed towards young children and not a larger audience. Rocco had an ability to speak to all ages, making a show that is timeless.

It makes me sad knowing that the next generation has been watching Dora The Explorer, Hanna Montanna, and shitty Animae cartoons. Scooby Doo Where are you!? We need to resurrect the idea of creating a comedy animated television show! A show that can be watched by kids and still have adult humor! IF we fail to do so, the great American cartoon will be lost. Who knows what kind of humor will be around in the future? It doesn't look too bright with the caliber of cartoons on television today. Family Guy can be too offensive for some ages, The Simpsons have been failing for years, and they cancelled their replacement Futurama! I propose a bailout to the writers of Nickelodeon, Cartoon Network, and Fox cartoon department. Why not, right? In tough times like these, Laughter may be the cure!


Nick